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#1: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-10 01:33:52 by Captain Infinity

I hate Patty and Selma because:

-they're mean to Homer
-they have gravelly voices
-they're ugly
-they're fat
-they smoke cigarettes
-they smell bad
-they think they're better than Marge
-they smoke cigars
-they have a lizard as a pet
-they're gay
-they watch Macgyver
-they dress badly
-they have stupid hairdos
-they use up screen time that would be better spent on Moe
-they don't shave their legs or armpits
-they have blue hair
-they work at the DMV and are mean to everyone
-they're twins

That's enough for now. I'll report back if I think of more reasons.



**
Captain Infinity

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#2: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-10 01:58:27 by wetraprock

Captain Infinity &lt;<a href="mailto:Infinity&#64;captaininfinity.us" target="_blank">Infinity&#64;captaininfinity.us</a>&gt; wrote:

&gt; I hate Patty and Selma because:
&gt;
&gt; -they're mean to Homer
&gt; -they have gravelly voices
&gt; -they're ugly
&gt; -they're fat
&gt; -they smoke cigarettes
&gt; -they smell bad
&gt; -they think they're better than Marge
&gt; -they smoke cigars
&gt; -they have a lizard as a pet
&gt; -they're gay
&gt; -they watch Macgyver
&gt; -they dress badly
&gt; -they have stupid hairdos
&gt; -they use up screen time that would be better spent on Moe
&gt; -they don't shave their legs or armpits
&gt; -they have blue hair
&gt; -they work at the DMV and are mean to everyone
&gt; -they're twins
&gt;
&gt; That's enough for now. I'll report back if I think of more reasons.

They're worse than Hitler!

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#3: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-10 03:23:12 by profjohnfrink

Impeach Churchill!


Walter Traprock wrote:
&gt; Captain Infinity &lt;<a href="mailto:Infinity&#64;captaininfinity.us" target="_blank">Infinity&#64;captaininfinity.us</a>&gt; wrote:
&gt;
&gt; &gt; I hate Patty and Selma because:
&gt; &gt;
&gt; &gt; -they're mean to Homer
&gt; &gt; -they have gravelly voices
&gt; &gt; -they're ugly
&gt; &gt; -they're fat
&gt; &gt; -they smoke cigarettes
&gt; &gt; -they smell bad
&gt; &gt; -they think they're better than Marge
&gt; &gt; -they smoke cigars
&gt; &gt; -they have a lizard as a pet
&gt; &gt; -they're gay
&gt; &gt; -they watch Macgyver
&gt; &gt; -they dress badly
&gt; &gt; -they have stupid hairdos
&gt; &gt; -they use up screen time that would be better spent on Moe
&gt; &gt; -they don't shave their legs or armpits
&gt; &gt; -they have blue hair
&gt; &gt; -they work at the DMV and are mean to everyone
&gt; &gt; -they're twins
&gt; &gt;
&gt; &gt; That's enough for now. I'll report back if I think of more reasons.
&gt;
&gt; They're worse than Hitler!

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#4: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-10 04:30:46 by R Flowers

&lt;<a href="mailto:profjohnfrink&#64;hotmail.com" target="_blank">profjohnfrink&#64;hotmail.com</a>&gt; wrote in message
news:<a href="mailto:1152494592.638506.298460&#64;m79g2000cwm.googlegroups.com..." target="_blank">1152494592.638506.298460&#64;m79g2000cwm.googlegroups.com...</a>
&gt; Impeach Churchill!
&gt;
&gt;

Churchill? What about that idiot Roosevelt? We get bombed by the Japanese,
and he invades Europe!

-- R Flowers
---- Sorry if I have used this joke previously here...

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#5: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-10 06:44:28 by wetraprock

&quot;R Flowers&quot; &lt;<a href="mailto:rflowers&#64;Tinbowlinggreen.com" target="_blank">rflowers&#64;Tinbowlinggreen.com</a>&gt; wrote:

&gt; &gt; Impeach Churchill!
&gt;
&gt; Churchill? What about that idiot Roosevelt? We get bombed by the Japanese,
&gt; and he invades Europe!

And what was it all for? To give us Patty and Selma!

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#6: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-10 15:28:27 by aaronhirshberg

&gt; &gt; That's enough for now. I'll report back if I think of more reasons.
&gt;
&gt; They're worse than Hitler!

Hey, what did Hitler ever do to you?

Aaron Space Museum

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#7: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-11 23:15:54 by Neil Coward

To take issue with some of your points cap'n

I don't think they are gay are they ?
Marge also has a gravelly voice
Lots of other characters are ugly
and fat
How do you know they smell bad? Do the DVDs come with smellavision?
Stupid hairdos? What about Marge, and Krusty and Sideshow Bob, oh and Bart
and Lisa

In their defence they sometimes have some good lines eg when Homer walks in
&quot;Is it me or has it just got FAT in here?&quot;




&quot;Captain Infinity&quot; &lt;<a href="mailto:Infinity&#64;captaininfinity.us" target="_blank">Infinity&#64;captaininfinity.us</a>&gt; wrote in message
news:<a href="mailto:dm33b2l9a5lneqm3qt6jpo2a2o8kauh9e3&#64;4ax.com..." target="_blank">dm33b2l9a5lneqm3qt6jpo2a2o8kauh9e3&#64;4ax.com...</a>
&gt;I hate Patty and Selma because:
&gt;
&gt; -they're mean to Homer
&gt; -they have gravelly voices
&gt; -they're ugly
&gt; -they're fat
&gt; -they smoke cigarettes
&gt; -they smell bad
&gt; -they think they're better than Marge
&gt; -they smoke cigars
&gt; -they have a lizard as a pet
&gt; -they're gay
&gt; -they watch Macgyver
&gt; -they dress badly
&gt; -they have stupid hairdos
&gt; -they use up screen time that would be better spent on Moe
&gt; -they don't shave their legs or armpits
&gt; -they have blue hair
&gt; -they work at the DMV and are mean to everyone
&gt; -they're twins
&gt;
&gt; That's enough for now. I'll report back if I think of more reasons.
&gt;
&gt;
&gt;
&gt; **
&gt; Captain Infinity
&gt;

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#8: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-12 00:56:43 by Captain Infinity

Once Upon A Time Neil Coward wrote:

&gt;To take issue with some of your points cap'n
&gt;
&gt;I don't think they are gay are they ?

Yes, they are.

&gt;Marge also has a gravelly voice

And that's one reason why I'm not too fond of Marge.

&gt;Lots of other characters are ugly and fat

Not like Patty and Selma, though. Patty and Selma are double-bag ugly.
They're fugly. They're pug fugly.

&gt;How do you know they smell bad? Do the DVDs come with smellavision?

Their stench reeks right out of my TV. Can't you smell them?

&gt;Stupid hairdos? What about Marge, and Krusty and Sideshow Bob, oh and Bart
&gt;and Lisa

If *I* worked on the Simpsons I would fix *all* those hairdos.

&gt;In their defence they sometimes have some good lines eg when Homer walks in
&gt;&quot;Is it me or has it just got FAT in here?&quot;

That's just being mean to Homer, which is number 1 on my list of reasons
why I hate them.


**
Captain Infinity

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#9: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-12 01:10:02 by Neil Coward

you should start your own cartoon then, where everyone is beautiful, has
lovely hair and is nice to each other - it'd be a smash hit!!



&quot;Captain Infinity&quot; &lt;<a href="mailto:Infinity&#64;captaininfinity.us" target="_blank">Infinity&#64;captaininfinity.us</a>&gt; wrote in message
news:<a href="mailto:sra8b2lufnehel8vmuitjldvm3dh4mjhks&#64;4ax.com..." target="_blank">sra8b2lufnehel8vmuitjldvm3dh4mjhks&#64;4ax.com...</a>
&gt; Once Upon A Time Neil Coward wrote:
&gt;
&gt;&gt;To take issue with some of your points cap'n
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;I don't think they are gay are they ?
&gt;
&gt; Yes, they are.
&gt;
&gt;&gt;Marge also has a gravelly voice
&gt;
&gt; And that's one reason why I'm not too fond of Marge.
&gt;
&gt;&gt;Lots of other characters are ugly and fat
&gt;
&gt; Not like Patty and Selma, though. Patty and Selma are double-bag ugly.
&gt; They're fugly. They're pug fugly.
&gt;
&gt;&gt;How do you know they smell bad? Do the DVDs come with smellavision?
&gt;
&gt; Their stench reeks right out of my TV. Can't you smell them?
&gt;
&gt;&gt;Stupid hairdos? What about Marge, and Krusty and Sideshow Bob, oh and Bart
&gt;&gt;and Lisa
&gt;
&gt; If *I* worked on the Simpsons I would fix *all* those hairdos.
&gt;
&gt;&gt;In their defence they sometimes have some good lines eg when Homer walks
&gt;&gt;in
&gt;&gt;&quot;Is it me or has it just got FAT in here?&quot;
&gt;
&gt; That's just being mean to Homer, which is number 1 on my list of reasons
&gt; why I hate them.
&gt;
&gt;
&gt; **
&gt; Captain Infinity

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#10: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-12 01:44:37 by Captain Infinity

Once Upon A Time Neil Coward wrote:

&gt;you should start your own cartoon then, where everyone is beautiful, has
&gt;lovely hair and is nice to each other - it'd be a smash hit!!

Thank you! What an excellent idea! Tomorrow I'll withdraw all my money
from my bank account and hire some Korean animators! WOO HOO!!


**
Captain Infinity

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#11: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-12 02:16:30 by R Flowers

&quot;Captain Infinity&quot; &lt;<a href="mailto:Infinity&#64;captaininfinity.us" target="_blank">Infinity&#64;captaininfinity.us</a>&gt; wrote in message
news:<a href="mailto:sra8b2lufnehel8vmuitjldvm3dh4mjhks&#64;4ax.com..." target="_blank">sra8b2lufnehel8vmuitjldvm3dh4mjhks&#64;4ax.com...</a>
&gt; Once Upon A Time Neil Coward wrote:
&gt;
&gt;&gt;To take issue with some of your points cap'n
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;I don't think they are gay are they ?
&gt;
&gt; Yes, they are.
&gt;

Just Patty. Selma is a serial hetero-monogamist.

-- R Flowers

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#12: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-12 12:56:30 by Captain Infinity

Once Upon A Time R Flowers wrote:

&gt;&quot;Captain Infinity&quot; &lt;<a href="mailto:Infinity&#64;captaininfinity.us" target="_blank">Infinity&#64;captaininfinity.us</a>&gt; wrote in message
&gt;news:<a href="mailto:sra8b2lufnehel8vmuitjldvm3dh4mjhks&#64;4ax.com..." target="_blank">sra8b2lufnehel8vmuitjldvm3dh4mjhks&#64;4ax.com...</a>
&gt;&gt; Once Upon A Time Neil Coward wrote:
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;&gt;To take issue with some of your points cap'n
&gt;&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt;&gt;I don't think they are gay are they ?
&gt;&gt;
&gt;&gt; Yes, they are.
&gt;&gt;
&gt;
&gt;Just Patty. Selma is a serial hetero-monogamist.

Patty's out. Selma is still in denial. Remember, they're twins, and
science has proved that if one twin gets the gay disease then the other
will catch it too. And NOBODY ARGUES WITH SCIENCE!!


**
Captain Infinity

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#13: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-12 15:10:25 by Syrus

Yeah, patty and Selma would probably have to be two of the worst
characters on the Simpsons. I'm glad they're rarely on. That episode
was very amusing where Patty came out, though i can recall a previous
episode where it was also hinted at as well.

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#14: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-12 16:19:22 by aaronhirshberg

According to <a href="http://www.snpp.com/episodes/3F16.html," target="_blank">http://www.snpp.com/episodes/3F16.html,</a> you have to also
remember to plagiarize!

Myers: Okay, maybe my dad did steal Itchy, but so what? Animation is
built on plagiarism!
[lawyer slaps his forehead]
If it weren't for someone plagiarizing the Honeymooners, we
wouldn't have the Flintstones. If someone hadn't ripped off Sgt.
Bilko, they'd be no Top Cat. Huckleberry Hound, Chief Wiggum,
Yogi Bear? Hah! Andy Griffith, Edward G. Robinson, Art Carney.
-- Er, don't forget Yogi Berra, &quot;The Day the Violence Died&quot;

Myers: Your honor, you take away our right to steal ideas, where are
they gonna come from? Her? [points at Marge]
Marge: Uh... Hmm... How about... Ghostmutt?
-- I see your point, &quot;The Day the Violence Died&quot;

Aaron Space Museum

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#15: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-14 15:47:51 by Macca7174

Neil Coward wrote:

&gt; you should start your own cartoon then, where everyone is beautiful, has
&gt; lovely hair and is nice to each other - it'd be a smash hit!!
&gt;
&gt;

Yeh, you could call it the Smurfs. Is there anything more beautiful
than blue? If there is, I don't want to know about it.

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#16: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-21 03:23:49 by legs

Macca7174 wrote:
&gt; Neil Coward wrote:
&gt;
&gt; &gt; you should start your own cartoon then, where everyone is beautiful, has
&gt; &gt; lovely hair and is nice to each other - it'd be a smash hit!!
&gt; &gt;
&gt; &gt;
&gt;
&gt; Yeh, you could call it the Smurfs. Is there anything more beautiful
&gt; than blue? If there is, I don't want to know about it.

Cap'n: O come on now, patty and selma are great. all the reasons you
wrote for hating them is why i love them.

&quot;is it me or did it just get fatter in here?&quot; great line.

They're histerically twisted in their wicked, selfish and righteous
way. besides homer needs an enemy.

the twins are some of my fav simpsons characters

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#17: Re: Why I hate Patty and Selma

Posted on 2006-07-21 03:26:30 by legs

Macca7174 wrote:
&gt; Neil Coward wrote:
&gt;
&gt; &gt; you should start your own cartoon then, where everyone is beautiful, has
&gt; &gt; lovely hair and is nice to each other - it'd be a smash hit!!
&gt; &gt;
&gt; &gt;
&gt;
&gt; Yeh, you could call it the Smurfs. Is there anything more beautiful
&gt; than blue? If there is, I don't want to know about it.

Cap'n: O come on now, patty and selma are great. all the reasons you
wrote for hating them is why i love them.

&quot;is it me or did it just get fatter in here?&quot; great line.

They're histerically twisted in their wicked, selfish and righteous
way. besides homer needs an enemy.

the twins are some of my fav simpsons characters

Report this message