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Fantasy » alt.fan.tolkien » JRR Tolkien and Cats
JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256617] Do, 27 April 2006 21:25
baggie  
Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR Tolkien's
"The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece we intend to
travel with in the summer.

We've got the script, actors, sets, and scheduling all lined up, but what
we're looking for just now is some spare cats. Each play (and there's going
to be a total of around 15, maybe 20, depending on audience interest) will
use up about 30 or so cats, so we're looking for a very good, reliable
supplier.

The main feature of the production will be the famous (or should I say,
infamous) scene where the cats all get torn to pieces by the vicious war-dog
belonging to the invading General, Grubb. The dog - played by a rotweiller
called Simon (he's got a spiked collar, and everything) - has been trained
to the role, and so the cats won't suffer all that much as Simon is very
good, and quick, at what he does.

If anyone knows of any cat-farms, cat-orphanages, unwanted-pets centres, old
cats homes, stray centres, or anywhere that can be depended upon to produce
a good, steady supply of cats, please get in touch with the email address on
our website. We will, of course, also appreciate any cat donations from sole
providers. Thanks.

- 'Tolkien in the Park' Productions Ltd.
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256618 ] Do, 27 April 2006 22:59
mlbriggs  
On Thu, 27 Apr 2006 20:25:10 +0100, Gorbag O'Sheite wrote:

> Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR Tolkien's
> "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece we intend to
> travel with in the summer.
>
> We've got the script, actors, sets, and scheduling all lined up, but what
> we're looking for just now is some spare cats. Each play (and there's going
> to be a total of around 15, maybe 20, depending on audience interest) will
> use up about 30 or so cats, so we're looking for a very good, reliable
> supplier.
>
> The main feature of the production will be the famous (or should I say,
> infamous) scene where the cats all get torn to pieces by the vicious war-dog
> belonging to the invading General, Grubb. The dog - played by a rotweiller
> called Simon (he's got a spiked collar, and everything) - has been trained
> to the role, and so the cats won't suffer all that much as Simon is very
> good, and quick, at what he does.
>
> If anyone knows of any cat-farms, cat-orphanages, unwanted-pets centres, old
> cats homes, stray centres, or anywhere that can be depended upon to produce
> a good, steady supply of cats, please get in touch with the email address on
> our website. We will, of course, also appreciate any cat donations from sole
> providers. Thanks.
>
> - 'Tolkien in the Park' Productions Ltd.


Suggestion: Have him practice on you. MLB
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256619 ] Fr, 28 April 2006 01:59
Mister Obvious  
"Matthew AKA NMR" <I_lovebeingacatslave [at] nospam.com> wrote in message
news:Mla4g.3199$9o4.2130 [at] tornado.tampabay.rr.com
>
> > "mlbriggs" mlbriggs [at] xmission wrote
> >
> > Suggestion: Have him practice on you. MLB
> >
>
> you a feeding a troll ML
>

You a feeding him too Matthew AKA NMR. You a twit. Heh!
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256620 ] Fr, 28 April 2006 03:34
studio  
No good for me.
I'm pretty sure my Big Mama would slap the sh*t out that dog
and make him cry.
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256621 ] Fr, 28 April 2006 04:02
mlbriggs  
On Fri, 28 Apr 2006 00:59:59 +0100, Mister Obvious wrote:

>
>
> "Matthew AKA NMR" <I_lovebeingacatslave [at] nospam.com> wrote in message
> news:Mla4g.3199$9o4.2130 [at] tornado.tampabay.rr.com
>>
>> > "mlbriggs" mlbriggs [at] xmission wrote
>> >
>> > Suggestion: Have him practice on you. MLB
>> >
>>
>> you a feeding a troll ML
>>
>
> You a feeding him too Matthew AKA NMR. You a twit. Heh!


So now there are three of us! MLB
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256623 ] Fr, 28 April 2006 04:54
MAO  
"Gorbag O'Sheite" <baggie [at] bagman.com> wrote in message
news:f5du8jvwhc7a3ce.270420062025 [at] Tolkien_in_the_Park...
> Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR
Tolkien's
> "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece we intend to
> travel with in the summer.
>

You spelled Beruthiel wrong.
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256624 ] Fr, 28 April 2006 05:22
MLBriggs {AT} shitsvi  
"mlbriggs" <mlbriggs [at] nospam.com> missed it all in message
news:pan.2006.04.28.02.02.26.12497 [at] nospam.com
>
> On Fri, 28 Apr 2006 00:59:59 +0100, Mister Obvious wrote:
>
> >
> > "Matthew AKA NMR" <I_lovebeingacatslave [at] nospam.com> wrote in message
> > news:Mla4g.3199$9o4.2130 [at] tornado.tampabay.rr.com
> > >
> > > > "mlbriggs" mlbriggs [at] xmission wrote
> > > >
> > > > Suggestion: Have him practice on you. MLB
> > > >
> > >
> > > you a feeding a troll ML
> > >
> >
> > You a feeding him too Matthew AKA NMR. You a twit. Heh!
>
>
> So now there are three of us! MLB
>

Jesus H. Christ! You're an idiot, MLBriggs! Aintcha!
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256625 ] Fr, 28 April 2006 05:41
baggie {AT} bagman {D  
"MAO" <trishtom [at] shaw.ca> wrote in message
news:jtf4g.81925$WI1.33262 [at] pd7tw2no
>
> "Gorbag O'Sheite" <baggie [at] bagman.com> wrote in message
> news:f5du8jvwhc7a3ce.270420062025 [at] Tolkien_in_the_Park...
>
> > Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR
> > Tolkien's "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece
> > we intend to travel with in the summer.
> >
>
> You spelled Beruthiel wrong.
>

No no no. I spelled it "B...a...r...u...t...h...e...l". Which is the
incorrect spelling. It *should* have been spelled
"B...e...r...u...t...h...i...e...l".
"Wrong" (w...r...o...n...g), when spoken, comes out as "wrong", which is
wrong. Doesn't sound anything like "Beruthiel", unlike "Baruthel", which
kind-of does, in a way, especially if you say it quickly, or when
drunk/stoned.
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256627 ] Fr, 28 April 2006 16:12
Troels Forchhammer  
In message <news:s8bm60evt2ut0gj.280420060441 [at] Tolkien_in_the_Park>
"Gorbag O'Sheite" <baggie {AT} bagman {DOT} com> enriched us with:
>

<snip>

> No no no. I spelled it "B...a...r...u...t...h...e...l". Which is
> the incorrect spelling.
[...]

There once was an Olog in AFT
A master of that noble craft
'Baruthel I spell
not Berúthiel,
but spelling it "wrong" would be daft'


It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared alltogether ;)

--
Troels Forchhammer
Valid e-mail is <t.forch(a)email.dk>

What is worse than a troll?
More Troels . . .
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256629 ] Fr, 28 April 2006 21:28
Joan in GB-W  
"MLBriggs's Arse" <MLBriggs {AT} shitsville {DOT} com> wrote in message
news:7hq0f3k6if00mta.280420060422 [at] MLBriggs_is_an_IDIOT!...
>
> "mlbriggs" <mlbriggs [at] nospam.com> missed it all in message
> news:pan.2006.04.28.02.02.26.12497 [at] nospam.com
> >
> > On Fri, 28 Apr 2006 00:59:59 +0100, Mister Obvious wrote:
> >
> > >
> > > "Matthew AKA NMR" <I_lovebeingacatslave [at] nospam.com> wrote in message
> > > news:Mla4g.3199$9o4.2130 [at] tornado.tampabay.rr.com
> > > >
> > > > > "mlbriggs" mlbriggs [at] xmission wrote
> > > > >
> > > > > Suggestion: Have him practice on you. MLB
> > > > >
> > > >
> > > > you a feeding a troll ML
> > > >
> > >
> > > You a feeding him too Matthew AKA NMR. You a twit. Heh!
> >
> >
> > So now there are three of us! MLB
> >
>
> Jesus H. Christ! You're an idiot, MLBriggs! Aintcha!
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256630 ] Fr, 28 April 2006 21:49
baggie {AT} bagman {D  
"Troels Forchhammer" <Troels [at] ThisIsFake.invalid> wrote, beautifully,
in message news:Xns97B3A6F94F13T.Forch [at] 131.228.6.98
>
> In message <news:s8bm60evt2ut0gj.280420060441 [at] Tolkien_in_the_Park>
> "Gorbag O'Sheite" <baggie {AT} bagman {DOT} com> enriched us with:
> >
>
> <snip>
>
> > No no no. I spelled it "B...a...r...u...t...h...e...l". Which is
> > the incorrect spelling.
> [...]
>
> There once was an Olog in AFT
> A master of that noble craft
> 'Baruthel I spell
> not Berúthiel,
> but spelling it "wrong" would be daft'
>
My heart is warmed
by your appreciative words
Though some may have formed
(the ridiculous turds)
The notion that trouble I parse
Well, they can kiss my arse.
>
> It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared alltogether ;)
>
Your wish is my command, brother-in-arms! Ahem ...... {cough} ......
"It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared".
.. . . . The joke - if such there be - only works, of course, if everyone
who's reading this (ie those that aren't pretending to have *plonked* me)
say it at the same time. Yes.

OK. So the joke should have stayed in the movie 'Airplane'. Sue me!

- 'Tolkien in the Park' Productions Ltd.
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256632 ] Do, 27 April 2006 23:58
Raven  
"Gorbag O'Sheite" <baggie [at] bagman.com> skrev i en meddelelse
news:f5du8jvwhc7a3ce.270420062025 [at] Tolkien_in_the_Park...

> Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR
> Tolkien's "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece
> we intend to travel with in the summer.

On this NG (alt.fan.tolkien) you could get in *seriously* hot water for
misspelling "Queen Berúthiel", if that was whom you referred to.

Voron.
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256633 ] Sa, 29 April 2006 04:47
baggie {AT} bagman {D  
"Raven" <jonlennart.beck.god [at] damn.get2net.that.dk.spam> wrote in message
news:otz4g.197$uP2.192 [at] news.get2net.dk
>
> "Gorbag O'Sheite" <baggie [at] bagman.com> skrev i en meddelelse
> news:f5du8jvwhc7a3ce.270420062025 [at] Tolkien_in_the_Park...
>
> > Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR
> > Tolkien's "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece
> > we intend to travel with in the summer.
> >
>
> On this NG (alt.fan.tolkien) you could get in *seriously* hot water
> for misspelling "Queen Berúthiel", if that was whom you referred to.
>

Yep - that sure was whom I was referring to, Voron / Raven /
jonlennart.beck.god. You bet. That Queen Bartholemew, or whatever the fuck
she's called. I know where you're coming from on this. There's nothing that
scrapes my scrotum like some nutjob that comes on to alt.fan.tolkien and
misspells some minor canonical character, the bastard. Damn them. Damn them
all to Hell. Damn their eyes. Damn their britches!

I wonder - do you have any specifics regarding the temperature of the said
water? In degrees centigrade, if you will. Thanks.

- 'Tolkien in the Park' Productions Ltd.
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256634 ] Sa, 29 April 2006 05:29
morgothscurse2002  
On Fri, 28 Apr 2006 14:12:52 GMT, Troels Forchhammer
<Troels [at] ThisIsFake.invalid> wrote:

>In message <news:s8bm60evt2ut0gj.280420060441 [at] Tolkien_in_the_Park>
>"Gorbag O'Sheite" <baggie {AT} bagman {DOT} com> enriched us with:
>>
>
><snip>
>
>> No no no. I spelled it "B...a...r...u...t...h...e...l". Which is
>> the incorrect spelling.
>[...]
>
>There once was an Olog in AFT
>A master of that noble craft
> 'Baruthel I spell
> not Berúthiel,
>but spelling it "wrong" would be daft'
>
>
>It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared alltogether ;)

How could it as long as you are a participant of these newsgroups?*
;-)


Morgoth's Curse

* (For those who are slow of wit, this is a pun based on his name.)
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256635 ] Sa, 29 April 2006 21:51
trowlin  
"Morgoth's Curse" <morgothscurse2002 [at] nospam.yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:h9n552dc2ejb91e6ic2p912q0hl324ck2m [at] 4ax.com
>
> On Fri, 28 Apr 2006 14:12:52 GMT, Troels Forchhammer
> <Troels [at] ThisIsFake.invalid> wrote:
>
> > In message <news:s8bm60evt2ut0gj.280420060441 [at] Tolkien_in_the_Park>
> > "Gorbag O'Sheite" <baggie {AT} bagman {DOT} com> enriched us with:
> > >
> > <snip>
> >
> > > No no no. I spelled it "B...a...r...u...t...h...e...l". Which is
> > > the incorrect spelling.
> > [...]
> >
>
> > There once was an Olog in AFT
> > A master of that noble craft
> > 'Baruthel I spell
> > not Berúthiel,
> > but spelling it "wrong" would be daft'
> >
> > It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared alltogether ;)
> >
>
> How could it as long as you are a participant of these newsgroups?*
> ;-)
> * (For those who are slow of wit, this is a pun based on his name.)
>

Eh? What the fuck do you mean?
"Troels Forchhammer" . . . . "Troels" . . . . Oh! Right! I see! "Troels"
sounds like "Trolls"! Yes! Ha-ha! That's very good! I never "got" that!
Cheers, mate! You're a pal!
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256636 ] Sa, 29 April 2006 22:17
Robinsons  
"Oh Mr. Trowley" wrote:

> Eh? What the fuck do you mean?
> "Troels Forchhammer" . . . . "Troels" . . . . Oh! Right! I see! "Troels"
> sounds like "Trolls"! Yes! Ha-ha! That's very good! I never "got" that!
> Cheers, mate! You're a pal!

Is it pronounced "Trolls"... or "Tray-ls"? HMMMM? I thought so!

Or possibly "Trül" (no s. leave the s right out!)

or "Trřlls"?

Or "Cřřts" (Canadian for cats)?

Or "AAAAaaa--argh"?
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256655 ] So, 30 April 2006 16:06
Christopher Kreuzer  
Troels Forchhammer <Troels [at] ThisIsFake.invalid> wrote:
> In message <news:s8bm60evt2ut0gj.280420060441 [at] Tolkien_in_the_Park>
> "Gorbag O'Sheite" <baggie {AT} bagman {DOT} com> enriched us with:
>>
>
> <snip>
>
>> No no no. I spelled it "B...a...r...u...t...h...e...l". Which is
>> the incorrect spelling.
> [...]
>
> There once was an Olog in AFT
> A master of that noble craft
> 'Baruthel I spell
> not Berúthiel,
> but spelling it "wrong" would be daft'
>
>
> It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared alltogether ;)

I was going to say they missed out the accent - but then I saw that you
and Raven supplied it for them.

And I woudl call this the Usenet version of "street theatre", rather
than trolling. To be called (successful) trolling in my book, you need
someone to reply to the obvious bait and complain about the cats being
torn to pieces. But no-one's done that yet, unless there is a surprise
waiting for me downthread.
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256656 ] So, 30 April 2006 16:10
Christopher Kreuzer  
Raven <jonlennart.beck.god [at] damn.get2net.that.dk.spam> wrote:
> "Gorbag O'Sheite" <baggie [at] bagman.com> skrev i en meddelelse
> news:f5du8jvwhc7a3ce.270420062025 [at] Tolkien_in_the_Park...
>
>> Hi. My amateur dramatics group is working on an adaptation of JRR
>> Tolkien's "The Queen of Baruthel's Cats" for an experimentalist piece
>> we intend to travel with in the summer.
>
> On this NG (alt.fan.tolkien) you could get in *seriously* hot
> water for misspelling "Queen Berúthiel", if that was whom you
> referred to.

I liked the reference to Grubb. Wasn't that a hobbit? As for the
"made-up" name of "Tolkien in the Park", I think that is actually the
name of a genuine production company - just shows the perils of
poorly-researched satire! :-)

Oh, and failing to make something out of the "nine black [cats] and one
white" bit! I mean, _30_ cats? Insupportable! The standards of trolling
are falling to all-time lows!
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256674 ] So, 30 April 2006 21:03
Troels Forchhammer  
In message <news:h9n552dc2ejb91e6ic2p912q0hl324ck2m [at] 4ax.com>
"Morgoth's Curse" <morgothscurse2002 [at] nospam.yahoo.com> enriched us
with:
>
> On Fri, 28 Apr 2006 14:12:52 GMT, Troels Forchhammer
> <Troels [at] ThisIsFake.invalid> wrote:
>>

<snip>

>> It is good to see that good trolling hasn't disappeared
>> alltogether ;)
>
> How could it as long as you are a participant of these
> newsgroups?* ;-)

:)

I hope you saw the .sig . . .

On the . . ., not 'serious', but perhaps less frivolous side, it's a
pun that only works with an English pronunciation -- in Danish it's
two syllables with he 'o' pronounced rather like French "eau" and the
'e' /almost/ a schwah (and of course the 'r' is back-tongue rather
than trilled).

I realise that most you have been on usenet long enough to know what
I might mean by 'good trolling', but for those few who haven't, I
mean the kind of troll that knows the subject matter well enough to
be humorous about it and whose posts tend to point out when the rest
of us are taking ourselves a bit to seriously.

--
Troels Forchhammer
Valid e-mail is <t.forch(a)email.dk>

Taking fun
as simply fun
and earnestness
in earnest
shows how thouroughly
thou none
of the two
discernest.
- Piet Hein, /The Eternal Twins/
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256686 ] Mo, 01 Mai 2006 07:06
Sean  
Gorbag O'Sheite wrote:

> The dog - played by a rotweiller
> called Simon (he's got a spiked collar, and everything) - has been trained
> to the role, and so the cats won't suffer all that much as Simon is very
> good, and quick, at what he does.

Somebody rent this guy an ocelot.

Sean_Q_
Re: JRR Tolkien and Cats [message #256687 ] Mo, 01 Mai 2006 09:55
Robinsons  
Sean wrote:

> Gorbag O'Sheite wrote:
>
> > The dog - played by a rotweiller
> > called Simon (he's got a spiked collar, and everything) - has been trained
> > to the role, and so the cats won't suffer all that much as Simon is very
> > good, and quick, at what he does.
>
> Somebody rent this guy an ocelot.

I imagine that'd cos' alot.

What about a hippopotamus?

He'd tear it from top to bottom-us.

("An Ocelot!" "It's only a model")
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