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Fantasy » alt.fan.harry-potter » Jo updates once more
Jo updates once more [message #245509] Mi, 05 April 2006 17:26
drusilla  
(I wonder, is she talking about Nicole Ritchie?. Interesting though.)

"For Girls Only, Probably...

Being thin. Probably not a subject that you ever expected to read about
on this website, but my recent trip to London got me thinking...

It started in the car on the way to Leavesden film studios. I whiled
away part of the journey reading a magazine that featured several glossy
photographs of a very young woman who is either seriously ill or
suffering from an eating disorder (which is, of course, the same thing);
anyway, there is no other explanation for the shape of her body. She can
talk about eating absolutely loads, being terribly busy and having the
world's fastest metabolism until her tongue drops off (hooray! Another
couple of ounces gone!), but her concave stomach, protruding ribs and
stick-like arms tell a different story. This girl needs help, but, the
world being what it is, they're sticking her on magazine covers instead.
All this passed through my mind as I read the interview, then I threw
the horrible thing aside.

But blow me down if the subject of girls and thinness didn't crop up
shortly after I got out of the car. I was talking to one of the actors
and, somehow or other, we got onto the subject of a girl he knows (not
any of the Potter actresses – somebody from his life beyond the films)
who had been dubbed 'fat' by certain charming classmates. (Could they
possibly be jealous that she knows the boy in question? Surely not!)

'But,' said the actor, in honest perplexity, 'she is really not fat.'

'"Fat" is usually the first insult a girl throws at another girl when
she wants to hurt her,' I said; I could remember it happening when I was
at school, and witnessing it among the teenagers I used to teach.
Nevertheless, I could see that to him, a well-adjusted male, it was
utterly bizarre behaviour, like yelling 'thicko!' at Stephen Hawking.

His bemusement at this everyday feature of female existence reminded me
how strange and sick the 'fat' insult is. I mean, is 'fat' really the
worst thing a human being can be? Is 'fat' worse than 'vindictive',
'jealous', 'shallow', 'vain', 'boring' or 'cruel'? Not to me; but then,
you might retort, what do I know about the pressure to be skinny? I'm
not in the business of being judged on my looks, what with being a
writer and earning my living by using my brain...

I went to the British Book Awards that evening. After the award ceremony
I bumped into a woman I hadn't seen for nearly three years. The first
thing she said to me? 'You've lost a lot of weight since the last time I
saw you!'

'Well,' I said, slightly nonplussed, 'the last time you saw me I'd just
had a baby.'

What I felt like saying was, 'I've produced my third child and my sixth
novel since I last saw you. Aren't either of those things more
important, more interesting, than my size?' But no – my waist looked
smaller! Forget the kid and the book: finally, something to celebrate!

So the issue of size and women was (ha, ha) weighing on my mind as I
flew home to Edinburgh the next day. Once up in the air, I opened a
newspaper and my eyes fell, immediately, on an article about the pop
star Pink.

Her latest single, 'Stupid Girls', is the antidote-anthem for everything
I had been thinking about women and thinness. 'Stupid Girls' satirises
the talking toothpicks held up to girls as role models: those
celebrities whose greatest achievement is un-chipped nail polish, whose
only aspiration seems to be getting photographed in a different outfit
nine times a day, whose only function in the world appears to be
supporting the trade in overpriced handbags and rat-sized dogs.

Maybe all this seems funny, or trivial, but it's really not. It's about
what girls want to be, what they're told they should be, and how they
feel about who they are. I've got two daughters who will have to make
their way in this skinny-obsessed world, and it worries me, because I
don't want them to be empty-headed, self-obsessed, emaciated clones; I'd
rather they were independent, interesting, idealistic, kind,
opinionated, original, funny – a thousand things, before 'thin'. And
frankly, I'd rather they didn't give a gust of stinking chihuahua
flatulence whether the woman standing next to them has fleshier knees
than they do. Let my girls be Hermiones, rather than Pansy Parkinsons.
Let them never be Stupid Girls. Rant over."
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245515 ] Mi, 05 April 2006 18:19
Magic_mom  
That is an absolutely wonderful wonderful *rant* she's done there! That
needs to be seen by every little girl on this face of this planet, and
then some. I am definitely going to make sure my beautiful, normal
sized 13 year old daughter sees it, along with all her beautiful normal
sized friends. I recall overhearing them awhile ago when they were
watching something on TV, in which there were plenty of those toothpick
sized bone bags.. they were basically debating whether they measured up
and did they really want pizza for dinner. I couldn't help but chime in
and tell them I would MUCH rather have a beautiful normal sized
daughter to hug than a bag of bones that I was afraid would crumble and
break, and that I was sure their own parents felt the same. The thing
is, my daughter and her friends aren't the least bit chubby; no babyfat
thing going on or anything. They are just *normal*. It is sad to think
that isn't seen as the perfect image these days.

Thank you so much for posting that. I would probably not have seen it
if you hadn't.

M_m
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245525 ] Mi, 05 April 2006 23:38
drusilla  
Magic_mom escribió:
> That is an absolutely wonderful wonderful *rant* she's done there! That
> needs to be seen by every little girl on this face of this planet, and
> then some. I am definitely going to make sure my beautiful, normal
> sized 13 year old daughter sees it, along with all her beautiful normal
> sized friends. I recall overhearing them awhile ago when they were
> watching something on TV, in which there were plenty of those toothpick
> sized bone bags.. they were basically debating whether they measured up
> and did they really want pizza for dinner. I couldn't help but chime in
> and tell them I would MUCH rather have a beautiful normal sized
> daughter to hug than a bag of bones that I was afraid would crumble and
> break, and that I was sure their own parents felt the same. The thing
> is, my daughter and her friends aren't the least bit chubby; no babyfat
> thing going on or anything. They are just *normal*. It is sad to think
> that isn't seen as the perfect image these days.
>
> Thank you so much for posting that. I would probably not have seen it
> if you hadn't.
>
> M_m
>

Luckily I have a boy!
Jokes aside, I understand. Kids now have completely messed up what's
normal and what's not. What's wrong with being like Hermione, anyway?
And I understand how Jo felt. I have, like her, met people I haven't
seen in years and no one asked me about my life but about my weight. I
felt like 'don't you want to talk about my kid, my job, my family, God!
even my blog!'. Nope... all about my weight, my weight, my weight.
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245531 ] Do, 06 April 2006 00:11
Brian  
drusilla wrote:
> What's wrong with being like Hermione, anyway?

Plenty--although many of the same things are wrong with her "cooler"
sisters. Ron, for example, considers her insufferable, and for good
reason--she is. It's an intellectual insufferability rather than a
popularity insufferability, but it amounts to much the same thing. The
fact that it probably stems from some basic insecurity doesn't mean that
it isn't something to be avoided.

That being said, Hermione has at least the redeeming quality of being
intelligent, which Pansy can't claim.

--
Brian Tung <brian [at] isi.edu>
The Astronomy Corner at http://astro.isi.edu/
Unofficial C5+ Home Page at http://astro.isi.edu/c5plus/
The PleiadAtlas Home Page at http://astro.isi.edu/pleiadatlas/
My Own Personal FAQ (SAA) at http://astro.isi.edu/reference/faq.html
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245532 ] Do, 06 April 2006 00:22
angelicallydemonic  
(The kids' perspective)

Surprisingly, us daughters don't think much differently. Most of us
are disgusted when we walk into the locker room and hear a girl tell a
story about how she threw up the contents of her dinner to manage her
weight. Personally, I've been taught by very loving parents weight
doesn't matter, and as long if I ever am concerned (I'm not) excercise
is the only way to go. And personally, my friends and I agree. I
guess it helps that my mother was a psychiatrist but she never
commented on my weight (which was normal, I've always kept in shape
because of dance) and she would disapprove of relatives who
did...whether they said I had lost weight or needed to gain weight.
But I have had friends who have been given much grief over this issue
from relatives and even their parents. I think eating disorders start
at the household. And it's becoming more common because of the whole
obesity issue and child diabetes, etc. I think parents are starting to
worry, and not hearing about these issues everywhere, start worrying if
their own child falls under the obese category or if their child is at
risk of developing child diabetes. Thus they inadvertantly mention
something to their child who starts developing these problems as a
result. I think parents have to be completely supportive and if they
suspect their child DOES have a weight problem...don't confront it
themselves...letting a doctor handle it will probably go by a lot
smoother with minimal negative effects. Anyways, that's the view of a
girl in high school.
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245542 ] Do, 06 April 2006 02:26
kenjohnston  
I went out with a girl once, and while we were driving along she got
kind of relaxed & dreamy and told me this story.
She had decided to stop eating. Not entirely of course, but enough so
that she felt she was in control of herself and no-one else was. She
managed to hide her thin-ness but eventually, her parents noticed.
They tried everything to maker her eat - punishment, rewards - but she
loved being in control.
Then one day, her father lost it. He dragged her infront of the mirror
so she could see how thin she was and started slapping her. Now her
parents were not the type to use physical punishment. They believed
(and I agree with them) that if you have to resort to physical
punishment, you've already lost.
But the point is, as he was hitting her, the only thing that went
through her head was "Boy I won that one!" Once she felt she had won,
she could start eating again.
She said that generally, eating disorders occur in girls of above
average intelligence, with parents who have very high expectations.
The girl feels trapped by these expectations and uses the eating
disorder as a way of taking control of her life.
I don't know if this is true but every time I hear of someone who has
an eating disorder, the conditions fit the model.

Ken
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245559 ] Do, 06 April 2006 04:58
Magic_mom  
doppleganger wrote:
> I went out with a girl once, and while we were driving along she got
> kind of relaxed & dreamy and told me this story.
> She had decided to stop eating. Not entirely of course, but enough so
> that she felt she was in control of herself and no-one else was. She
> managed to hide her thin-ness but eventually, her parents noticed.
> They tried everything to maker her eat - punishment, rewards - but she
> loved being in control.
> Then one day, her father lost it. He dragged her infront of the mirror
> so she could see how thin she was and started slapping her. Now her
> parents were not the type to use physical punishment. They believed
> (and I agree with them) that if you have to resort to physical
> punishment, you've already lost.
> But the point is, as he was hitting her, the only thing that went
> through her head was "Boy I won that one!" Once she felt she had won,
> she could start eating again.
> She said that generally, eating disorders occur in girls of above
> average intelligence, with parents who have very high expectations.
> The girl feels trapped by these expectations and uses the eating
> disorder as a way of taking control of her life.

It is often just that.. what, how, or even *if* they eat, is entirely
under their control. It is usually the only thing they feel they have
any control over in their lives.

M_m
> I don't know if this is true but every time I hear of someone who has
> an eating disorder, the conditions fit the model.
>
> Ken
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245560 ] Do, 06 April 2006 05:07
Froggy  
"drusilla" <me [at] me.net> wrote in message news:e10nic$5ns$1 [at] emma.aioe.org...
> (I wonder, is she talking about Nicole Ritchie?. Interesting though.)
>
> "For Girls Only, Probably...
>
> Being thin. Probably not a subject that you ever expected to read about on
> this website, but my recent trip to London got me thinking...
>
> It started in the car on the way to Leavesden film studios. I whiled away
> part of the journey reading a magazine that featured several glossy
> photographs of a very young woman who is either seriously ill or suffering
> from an eating disorder (which is, of course, the same thing); anyway,
> there is no other explanation for the shape of her body. She can talk
> about eating absolutely loads, being terribly busy and having the world's
> fastest metabolism until her tongue drops off (hooray! Another couple of
> ounces gone!), but her concave stomach, protruding ribs and stick-like
> arms tell a different story. This girl needs help, but, the world being
> what it is, they're sticking her on magazine covers instead. All this
> passed through my mind as I read the interview, then I threw the horrible
> thing aside.
>
> But blow me down if the subject of girls and thinness didn't crop up
> shortly after I got out of the car. I was talking to one of the actors
> and, somehow or other, we got onto the subject of a girl he knows (not any
> of the Potter actresses – somebody from his life beyond the films) who had
> been dubbed 'fat' by certain charming classmates. (Could they possibly be
> jealous that she knows the boy in question? Surely not!)
>
> 'But,' said the actor, in honest perplexity, 'she is really not fat.'
>
> '"Fat" is usually the first insult a girl throws at another girl when she
> wants to hurt her,' I said; I could remember it happening when I was at
> school, and witnessing it among the teenagers I used to teach.
> Nevertheless, I could see that to him, a well-adjusted male, it was
> utterly bizarre behaviour, like yelling 'thicko!' at Stephen Hawking.
>
> His bemusement at this everyday feature of female existence reminded me
> how strange and sick the 'fat' insult is. I mean, is 'fat' really the
> worst thing a human being can be? Is 'fat' worse than 'vindictive',
> 'jealous', 'shallow', 'vain', 'boring' or 'cruel'? Not to me; but then,
> you might retort, what do I know about the pressure to be skinny? I'm not
> in the business of being judged on my looks, what with being a writer and
> earning my living by using my brain...
>
> I went to the British Book Awards that evening. After the award ceremony I
> bumped into a woman I hadn't seen for nearly three years. The first thing
> she said to me? 'You've lost a lot of weight since the last time I saw
> you!'
>
> 'Well,' I said, slightly nonplussed, 'the last time you saw me I'd just
> had a baby.'
>
> What I felt like saying was, 'I've produced my third child and my sixth
> novel since I last saw you. Aren't either of those things more important,
> more interesting, than my size?' But no – my waist looked smaller! Forget
> the kid and the book: finally, something to celebrate!
>
> So the issue of size and women was (ha, ha) weighing on my mind as I flew
> home to Edinburgh the next day. Once up in the air, I opened a newspaper
> and my eyes fell, immediately, on an article about the pop star Pink.
>
> Her latest single, 'Stupid Girls', is the antidote-anthem for everything I
> had been thinking about women and thinness. 'Stupid Girls' satirises the
> talking toothpicks held up to girls as role models: those celebrities
> whose greatest achievement is un-chipped nail polish, whose only
> aspiration seems to be getting photographed in a different outfit nine
> times a day, whose only function in the world appears to be supporting the
> trade in overpriced handbags and rat-sized dogs.
>
> Maybe all this seems funny, or trivial, but it's really not. It's about
> what girls want to be, what they're told they should be, and how they feel
> about who they are. I've got two daughters who will have to make their way
> in this skinny-obsessed world, and it worries me, because I don't want
> them to be empty-headed, self-obsessed, emaciated clones; I'd rather they
> were independent, interesting, idealistic, kind, opinionated, original,
> funny – a thousand things, before 'thin'. And frankly, I'd rather they
> didn't give a gust of stinking chihuahua flatulence whether the woman
> standing next to them has fleshier knees than they do. Let my girls be
> Hermiones, rather than Pansy Parkinsons. Let them never be Stupid Girls.
> Rant over."

I've looked but where did you find this?
--
(*)(*)
(------)
Froggy
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245562 ] Do, 06 April 2006 06:48
drusilla  
Froggy escribió:

>
> I've looked but where did you find this?

I read that in Mugglenet but I think is in the extras section
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245566 ] Do, 06 April 2006 10:08
Toon  
On Wed, 05 Apr 2006 10:26:15 -0500, drusilla <me [at] me.net> wrote:

>Her latest single, 'Stupid Girls', is the antidote-anthem for everything
>I had been thinking about women and thinness. 'Stupid Girls' satirises
>the talking toothpicks held up to girls as role models: those
>celebrities whose greatest achievement is un-chipped nail polish, whose
>only aspiration seems to be getting photographed in a different outfit
>nine times a day, whose only function in the world appears to be
>supporting the trade in overpriced handbags and rat-sized dogs.

Ah man, Jo just dissed rat size doggies.

Hee Hee. She listens to Pink.

Problem is those magazine girls are photoshoped into "perfection", and
most guys don't want them anyways.
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245575 ] Do, 06 April 2006 10:30
Zolak of Twylo  
On 2006-04-05 11:26:15 -0400, drusilla <me [at] me.net> said:

> (I wonder, is she talking about Nicole Ritchie?. Interesting though.)
>
> "For Girls Only, Probably...
>
> Being thin. Probably not a subject that you ever expected to read about
> on this website, but my recent trip to London got me thinking...

{SNIP}

Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.

I'm printing this and handing it to my daughter.

--
Enjoy,

Zolak of Twylo
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245578 ] Do, 06 April 2006 10:40
dsueme  
drusilla wrote:

> It started in the car on the way to Leavesden film studios. I whiled
> away part of the journey reading a magazine that featured several glossy
> photographs of a very young woman who is either seriously ill or
> suffering from an eating disorder (which is, of course, the same thing);
> anyway, there is no other explanation for the shape of her body.

If there is anything that proves that JKR is the world's richest woman
largely through luck, this is it.

We have here absolutely zero analysis.

Dave
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245581 ] Do, 06 April 2006 10:53
Zolak of Twylo  
On 2006-04-05 11:26:15 -0400, drusilla <me [at] me.net> said:

> (I wonder, is she talking about Nicole Ritchie?. Interesting though.)
>
> "For Girls Only, Probably...
>
> Being thin. Probably not a subject that you ever expected to read about
> on this website, but my recent trip to London got me thinking...

{SNIP}

Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.

I'm printing this and handing it to my daughter.

--
Enjoy,

Zolak of Twylo
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245621 ] Do, 06 April 2006 21:49
pooter  
David Sueme [dsueme [at] comcast.net] said
>
> drusilla wrote:
>
> > It started in the car on the way to Leavesden film studios. I whiled
> > away part of the journey reading a magazine that featured several glossy
> > photographs of a very young woman who is either seriously ill or
> > suffering from an eating disorder (which is, of course, the same thing);
> > anyway, there is no other explanation for the shape of her body.
>
> If there is anything that proves that JKR is the world's richest woman
> largely through luck, this is it.
>
> We have here absolutely zero analysis.
>
> Dave
>
>

And you would presumably be just as rich as her if only you had her
luck?
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245624 ] Do, 06 April 2006 22:45
Joe Curwen  
In article <2006040604535811272-dannythomas [at] walnutscom>, Zolak of Twylo says...
>
>On 2006-04-05 11:26:15 -0400, drusilla <me [at] me.net> said:
>
>> (I wonder, is she talking about Nicole Ritchie?. Interesting though.)
>>
>> "For Girls Only, Probably...
>>
>> Being thin. Probably not a subject that you ever expected to read about
>> on this website, but my recent trip to London got me thinking...
>
>{SNIP}
>
>Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
>
>I'm printing this and handing it to my daughter.
>

Without thumbs? I don't think so.

--
Joe


--
NewsGuy.Com 30Gb $9.95 Carry Forward and On Demand Bandwidth
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245631 ] Fr, 07 April 2006 00:25
Zolak of Twylo  
On 2006-04-06 16:45:41 -0400, Joe Curwen <jcurwen [at] freeonline.com> said:

> In article <2006040604535811272-dannythomas [at] walnutscom>, Zolak of Twylo says...
>>
>> On 2006-04-05 11:26:15 -0400, drusilla <me [at] me.net> said:
>>
>>> (I wonder, is she talking about Nicole Ritchie?. Interesting though.)
>>>
>>> "For Girls Only, Probably...
>>>
>>> Being thin. Probably not a subject that you ever expected to read about
>>> on this website, but my recent trip to London got me thinking...
>>
>> {SNIP}
>>
>> Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
>>
>> I'm printing this and handing it to my daughter.
>>
>
> Without thumbs? I don't think so.
>
> --
> Joe

Explain.

--
Enjoy,

Zolak of Twylo
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245632 ] Fr, 07 April 2006 00:27
Zolak of Twylo  
On 2006-04-06 16:45:41 -0400, Joe Curwen <jcurwen [at] freeonline.com> said:

> In article <2006040604535811272-dannythomas [at] walnutscom>, Zolak of Twylo says...
>>
>> On 2006-04-05 11:26:15 -0400, drusilla <me [at] me.net> said:
>>
>>> (I wonder, is she talking about Nicole Ritchie?. Interesting though.)
>>>
>>> "For Girls Only, Probably...
>>>
>>> Being thin. Probably not a subject that you ever expected to read about
>>> on this website, but my recent trip to London got me thinking...
>>
>> {SNIP}
>>
>> Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
>>
>> I'm printing this and handing it to my daughter.
>>
>
> Without thumbs? I don't think so.
>
> --
> Joe

Never mind. I was asleep for second there. Guess it's all those walnuts.

--
Enjoy,

Zolak of Twylo
Re: Jo updates once more [message #245643 ] Fr, 07 April 2006 01:48
drusilla  
Toon escribió:
> On Wed, 05 Apr 2006 10:26:15 -0500, drusilla <me [at] me.net> wrote:
>
>> Her latest single, 'Stupid Girls', is the antidote-anthem for everything
>> I had been thinking about women and thinness. 'Stupid Girls' satirises
>> the talking toothpicks held up to girls as role models: those
>> celebrities whose greatest achievement is un-chipped nail polish, whose
>> only aspiration seems to be getting photographed in a different outfit
>> nine times a day, whose only function in the world appears to be
>> supporting the trade in overpriced handbags and rat-sized dogs.
>
> Ah man, Jo just dissed rat size doggies.
>
> Hee Hee. She listens to Pink.

She's a cool mum :) I do kinda like Pink as well, but if I tell my mum
'I like Pink', I better expect lots of pink t-shirts for my birthday :S
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