Slytherin Toilet Graffiti

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Fantasy » alt.fan.harry-potter » Slytherin Toilet Graffiti

Slytherin Toilet Graffiti [message #224113]

Mo, 27 Februar 2006 23:14

John VanSickle

Here I sit
Here I struggle
Giving birth
To another Muggle

Regards,
John
(who thought of this at work and couldn't stop himself)
(and who also wonders to what extremes this will inspire the group)

Re: Slytherin Toilet Graffiti [message #224115 ]

Mo, 27 Februar 2006 23:53

Eric Bohlman

John VanSickle <evilsnack [at] earthlink.net> wrote in news:zRKMf.5044$5M6.622
[at] newsread2.news.atl.earthlink.net:

> Here I sit
> Here I struggle
> Giving birth
> To another Muggle
>
> Regards,
> John
> (who thought of this at work and couldn't stop himself)
> (and who also wonders to what extremes this will inspire the group)

Eat shit.
A hundred Gryffindors can't be wrong.

Re: Slytherin Toilet Graffiti [message #224177 ]

Di, 28 Februar 2006 09:40

cwlNOSPAM

Re: Slytherin Toilet Graffiti [message #224185 ]

Di, 28 Februar 2006 11:00

cwlNOSPAM

Re: Slytherin Toilet Graffiti [message #224189 ]

Di, 28 Februar 2006 13:14

cwlNOSPAM

In article <zRKMf.5044$5M6.622 [at] newsread2.news.atl.earthlink.net>, John
VanSickle <evilsnack [at] earthlink.net> wrote:

>Here I sit
>Here I struggle
>Giving birth
>To another Muggle
>
>Regards,
>John
>(who thought of this at work and couldn't stop himself)
>(and who also wonders to what extremes this will inspire the group)

Loony Luna is a Lousy Lay. - Neville
......
True or false? Snape is gay.
UNDERNEATH:
True. He want's to Remus.
......
In case a Basilisk comes out of the toilet:
1. Put your hands over your eyes.
2. Put your head between your legs.
3. Kiss your ass goodbye.
4. You've had it!
......
The pain stops behind the black curtain. - Sirius
......
To kick the bucket is beyond the pail. - Sirius
......
Death is the greatest kick of all. - Albus
UNDERNEATH:
I'm saving it for last. - Tom
......
Binns is a swinger.
......
Luna loves swans.
......
Lily married for money.
......
Reality is for people who can't cope with drugs. - Sibyll
......
Harry! Phone your mother!
......
I dreamed I could wear a wonder bra. - Sibyll
......
All the boys at Hogwarts are queer.
UNDERNEATH:
Except for one, and he's a lesbian.
......
Neville is a stupid faget!
UNDERNEATH:
I may be stupid, but at least I can spell fagget.
......
The queers in this school are the ugliest in all Scotland.
UNDERNEATH:
Buggers can't be choosers sweetie!
......
DO NOT WRITE ON THE WALLS. - Argus Filch
UNDERNEATH:
You want we should type maybe?
......
Immortality is an essential part of life. - Tom
......
The world is flat. - Nick, Class of 1492
......
Quidditch is a game played by gentlemen with odd balls.
......
Join the Death Eaters.
Meet interesting people and kill them.
......
Reality is an illusion caused ba lack of alcohol. - Sibyll
......
Evil spelled backwards is live. - Severus
......
You have to take the bad with the worst. - Tom
......
Tolkien is Hobbit-forming. - JKR
......
Happiness is melanchology. - Luna
......
Sadism: the science of being unhappy? - Severus
......
You've got to kiss a lot of toads before you find your prince. - Eileen
--
Chris

Re: Slytherin Toilet Graffiti [message #224212 ]

Di, 28 Februar 2006 18:55

drusilla

Green-Eyed Chris escribió:
> In article <zRKMf.5044$5M6.622 [at] newsread2.news.atl.earthlink.net>, John
> VanSickle <evilsnack [at] earthlink.net> wrote:
>
>> Here I sit
>> Here I struggle
>> Giving birth
>> To another Muggle
>>
>> Regards,
>> John
>> (who thought of this at work and couldn't stop himself)
>> (and who also wonders to what extremes this will inspire the group)
>
> Loony Luna is a Lousy Lay. - Neville
> .....
> True or false? Snape is gay.
> UNDERNEATH:
> True. He want's to Remus.
> .....
> In case a Basilisk comes out of the toilet:
> 1. Put your hands over your eyes.
> 2. Put your head between your legs.
> 3. Kiss your ass goodbye.
> 4. You've had it!
> .....
> The pain stops behind the black curtain. - Sirius
> .....
> To kick the bucket is beyond the pail. - Sirius
> .....
> Death is the greatest kick of all. - Albus
> UNDERNEATH:
> I'm saving it for last. - Tom
> .....
> Binns is a swinger.
> .....
> Luna loves swans.
> .....
> Lily married for money.
> .....
> Reality is for people who can't cope with drugs. - Sibyll
> .....
> Harry! Phone your mother!
> .....
> I dreamed I could wear a wonder bra. - Sibyll
> .....
> All the boys at Hogwarts are queer.
> UNDERNEATH:
> Except for one, and he's a lesbian.
> .....
> Neville is a stupid faget!
> UNDERNEATH:
> I may be stupid, but at least I can spell fagget.
> .....
> The queers in this school are the ugliest in all Scotland.
> UNDERNEATH:
> Buggers can't be choosers sweetie!
> .....
> DO NOT WRITE ON THE WALLS. - Argus Filch
> UNDERNEATH:
> You want we should type maybe?
> .....
> Immortality is an essential part of life. - Tom
> .....
> The world is flat. - Nick, Class of 1492
> .....
> Quidditch is a game played by gentlemen with odd balls.
> .....
> Join the Death Eaters.
> Meet interesting people and kill them.
> .....
> Reality is an illusion caused ba lack of alcohol. - Sibyll
> .....
> Evil spelled backwards is live. - Severus
> .....
> You have to take the bad with the worst. - Tom
> .....
> Tolkien is Hobbit-forming. - JKR
> .....
> Happiness is melanchology. - Luna
> .....
> Sadism: the science of being unhappy? - Severus
> .....
> You've got to kiss a lot of toads before you find your prince. - Eileen
> --
> Chris

Er... I think you spend lot of time in public bathrooms, don't you?

_
*** Free account sponsored by SecureIX.com ***
*** Encrypt your Internet usage with a free VPN account from http://www.SecureIX.com ***

Re: Slytherin Toilet Graffiti [message #224219 ]

Di, 28 Februar 2006 20:14

aaron

Pure bloods who write on shit house walls
Roll their shit in little balls.
Mudbloods who read these words of wit
Eat those little balls of shit.

-Aaron

Re: Slytherin Toilet Graffiti [message #224263 ]

Mi, 01 März 2006 01:40

Blon Fel Fotch Passam

Green-Eyed Chris wrote:

> John VanSickle wrote:

>> Here I sit
>> Here I struggle
>> Giving birth
>> To another Muggle

> Help retarded children, support muggle schools.
> .....
> The sign at the Hog's Head "Employees must wash hands before leaving"
> was changed to: "No one must wash hands before leaving, do it after!!"
> .....
> Don't forget to pull the chain. Myrtle needs the water.
> .....
> Down with Voldemort.
> UNDERNEATH:
> Yeah, down with all the French.
> .....
> In case of DE attack, duck under urinal, it hasn't been hit yet.
> .....
> I do believe with all my wit
> That Albus' ghost comes here to shit.
> .....
> Dumbledore is a transvestite.
> UNDERNEATH:
> He's dead, you dope!
> UNDERNEATH:
> OK. Dumbledore is a dead transvestite.
> .....
> Let's legalize the imperius.
> .....
> Death eating is camp.
> .....
> Vice is nice, but incest is best. - Marvolo
> .....
> Save your seeds! - Pomona Sprout
> .....
> Filch, Filch, the janitor man
> Chief superintendent of the crapping can.
> He washes out the bowls and picks up the towels
> And listens to the roar of other men's bowels.
> .....
> Loony Luna is a Lousy Lay. - Neville
> .....
> True or false? Snape is gay.
> UNDERNEATH:
> True. He want's to Remus.
> .....
> In case a Basilisk comes out of the toilet:
> 1. Put your hands over your eyes.
> 2. Put your head between your legs.
> 3. Kiss your ass goodbye.
> 4. You've had it!
> .....
> The pain stops behind the black curtain. - Sirius
> .....
> To kick the bucket is beyond the pail. - Sirius
> .....
> Death is the greatest kick of all. - Albus
> UNDERNEATH:
> I'm saving it for last. - Tom
> .....
> Binns is a swinger.
> .....
> Luna loves swans.
> .....
> Lily married for money.
> .....
> Reality is for people who can't cope with drugs. - Sibyll
> .....
> Harry! Phone your mother!
> .....
> I dreamed I could wear a wonder bra. - Sibyll
> .....
> All the boys at Hogwarts are queer.
> UNDERNEATH:
> Except for one, and he's a lesbian.
> .....
> Neville is a stupid faget!
> UNDERNEATH:
> I may be stupid, but at least I can spell fagget.
> .....
> The queers in this school are the ugliest in all Scotland.
> UNDERNEATH:
> Buggers can't be choosers sweetie!
> .....
> Quidditch is a game played by gentlemen with odd balls.
> .....
> Join the Death Eaters.
> Meet interesting people and kill them.
> .....
> Reality is an illusion caused ba lack of alcohol. - Sibyll
> .....
> Evil spelled backwards is live. - Severus
> .....
> Happiness is melanchology. - Luna
> .....
> Sadism: the science of being unhappy? - Severus
> .....
> You've got to kiss a lot of toads before you find your prince. - Eileen

Hermione Granger made me a homosexual.
UNDERNEATH:
If I gave her the wool, would she make me one as well?
......
House elves are never satyrsfied.
......
The difference between Hogwarts & a cactus plant
is that the cactus has the pricks on the outside.
......
The Dark Lord says one out of four Slytherins is a half-blood.
Check three housemates. If they are okay, you're next to die.
......
Really? What a coincidence, I have the emotional range of a teaspoon too!!
......
What I want is all of the power and none of the responsibility.
......
Never hit a Gryffindor with glasses. Hit him with a bludger.
......
Anal erotics are behind us all the way.
......
Old aurors never die. Young ones do.
......
Ginny Weasley should be obscene and not heard.
......
Death is the Dark Lord's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy.
......
Herbology grows on you.
......
When I said "we", Professor McGonagall, I was referring
to myself, the four Ravenclaws, and of course the goat.
......
Have you noticed how much they look like orchids? Lovely!
......
Pureblood, n. : Someone whose family tree does not fork.
......
BE ALERT! Hufflepuff needs more lerts.
......
DRACO: I hear Zabini has bummed every girl in Slytherin, except one.
PANSY: Ooooh! I bet it's that fat cow Millicent Bulstrode!
......
The only thing worse than Arithmancy is two rithmancies.
......
Pretend to spank me - I'm a pseudo-masochist!
......
Keep Slytherin green - have sex with a frog.
......
Q: Why does it say "Fuck the Pope" in the Hog's Head toilets?
A: Because people can't be bothered to write "Fuck the Moderator
of the General Assembly of the Church of Scotland".
......
As we speak, Death Eater terrorists are poisoning the pumpkin juice
with a potion which makes people gay. Accordingly, Professor Snape
has now raised the alert level to fuchsia.
......
Kneazles can be dangerous, but a little pussy never hurt anyone.

Blon Fel Fotch Passameer-Day Slitheen

--
Free Margaret Blaine now!

Re: Slytherin Toilet Graffiti [message #224294 ]

Mi, 01 März 2006 13:45

cwlNOSPAM

In article <bffpds.57896956185359 [at] raxacoricofallapatoria>, Blon Fel Fotch
Passameer-Day Slitheen <bffpds [at] raxacoricofallapatoria> wrote:

>Green-Eyed Chris wrote:
>
>> John VanSickle wrote:
>
>>> Here I sit
>>> Here I struggle
>>> Giving birth
>>> To another Muggle
>
>> Help retarded children, support muggle schools.
>> .....
>> The sign at the Hog's Head "Employees must wash hands before leaving"
>> was changed to: "No one must wash hands before leaving, do it after!!"
>> .....
>> Don't forget to pull the chain. Myrtle needs the water.
>> .....
>> Down with Voldemort.
>> UNDERNEATH:
>> Yeah, down with all the French.
>> .....
>> In case of DE attack, duck under urinal, it hasn't been hit yet.
>> .....
>> I do believe with all my wit
>> That Albus' ghost comes here to shit.
>> .....
>> Dumbledore is a transvestite.
>> UNDERNEATH:
>> He's dead, you dope!
>> UNDERNEATH:
>> OK. Dumbledore is a dead transvestite.
>> .....
>> Let's legalize the imperius.
>> .....
>> Death eating is camp.
>> .....
>> Vice is nice, but incest is best. - Marvolo
>> .....
>> Save your seeds! - Pomona Sprout
>> .....
>> Filch, Filch, the janitor man
>> Chief superintendent of the crapping can.
>> He washes out the bowls and picks up the towels
>> And listens to the roar of other men's bowels.
>> .....
>> Loony Luna is a Lousy Lay. - Neville
>> .....
>> True or false? Snape is gay.
>> UNDERNEATH:
>> True. He want's to Remus.
>> .....
>> In case a Basilisk comes out of the toilet:
>> 1. Put your hands over your eyes.
>> 2. Put your head between your legs.
>> 3. Kiss your ass goodbye.
>> 4. You've had it!
>> .....
>> The pain stops behind the black curtain. - Sirius
>> .....
>> To kick the bucket is beyond the pail. - Sirius
>> .....
>> Death is the greatest kick of all. - Albus
>> UNDERNEATH:
>> I'm saving it for last. - Tom
>> .....
>> Binns is a swinger.
>> .....
>> Luna loves swans.
>> .....
>> Lily married for money.
>> .....
>> Reality is for people who can't cope with drugs. - Sibyll
>> .....
>> Harry! Phone your mother!
>> .....
>> I dreamed I could wear a wonder bra. - Sibyll
>> .....
>> All the boys at Hogwarts are queer.
>> UNDERNEATH:
>> Except for one, and he's a lesbian.
>> .....
>> Neville is a stupid faget!
>> UNDERNEATH:
>> I may be stupid, but at least I can spell fagget.
>> .....
>> The queers in this school are the ugliest in all Scotland.
>> UNDERNEATH:
>> Buggers can't be choosers sweetie!
>> .....
>> Quidditch is a game played by gentlemen with odd balls.
>> .....
>> Join the Death Eaters.
>> Meet interesting people and kill them.
>> .....
>> Reality is an illusion caused ba lack of alcohol. - Sibyll
>> .....
>> Evil spelled backwards is live. - Severus
>> .....
>> Happiness is melanchology. - Luna
>> .....
>> Sadism: the science of being unhappy? - Severus
>> .....
>> You've got to kiss a lot of toads before you find your prince. - Eileen
>
>Hermione Granger made me a homosexual.
>UNDERNEATH:
>If I gave her the wool, would she make me one as well?
>.....
>House elves are never satyrsfied.
>.....
>The difference between Hogwarts & a cactus plant
>is that the cactus has the pricks on the outside.
>.....
>The Dark Lord says one out of four Slytherins is a half-blood.
>Check three housemates. If they are okay, you're next to die.
>.....
>Really? What a coincidence, I have the emotional range of a teaspoon too!!
>.....
>What I want is all of the power and none of the responsibility.
>.....
>Never hit a Gryffindor with glasses. Hit him with a bludger.
>.....
>Anal erotics are behind us all the way.
>.....
>Old aurors never die. Young ones do.
>.....
>Ginny Weasley should be obscene and not heard.
>.....
>Death is the Dark Lord's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy.
>.....
>Herbology grows on you.
>.....
>When I said "we", Professor McGonagall, I was referring
>to myself, the four Ravenclaws, and of course the goat.
>.....
>Have you noticed how much they look like orchids? Lovely!
>.....
>Pureblood, n. : Someone whose family tree does not fork.
>.....
>BE ALERT! Hufflepuff needs more lerts.
>.....
>DRACO: I hear Zabini has bummed every girl in Slytherin, except one.
>PANSY: Ooooh! I bet it's that fat cow Millicent Bulstrode!
>.....
>The only thing worse than Arithmancy is two rithmancies.
>.....
>Pretend to spank me - I'm a pseudo-masochist!
>.....
>Keep Slytherin green - have sex with a frog.
>.....
>Q: Why does it say "Fuck the Pope" in the Hog's Head toilets?
>A: Because people can't be bothered to write "Fuck the Moderator
> of the General Assembly of the Church of Scotland".
>.....
>As we speak, Death Eater terrorists are poisoning the pumpkin juice
>with a potion which makes people gay. Accordingly, Professor Snape
>has now raised the alert level to fuchsia.
>.....
>Kneazles can be dangerous, but a little pussy never hurt anyone.
>

Ars Longa, Vita Herring. - JKR
......
The difference between "stick-up" and "hold-up" is age. - A.D.
......
War is good business, invest your sons. - Bella
......
Now being organized, the Slytherin Heterosexual Club (underground).
......
We hate all Mudbloods, regardless of race, color or creed.
......
Bring back Muggle slavery.
......
The MoM reminds patrons of the Hogwarts Express that it is forbidden to
leave one's seat while the bowels are in motion.
......
Here I sit in stinking vapor.
Crabbe and Goyle ate up the paper.
......
I love Narcissa!
UNDERNEATH:
So does Narcissa!
......
Please do not throw cigarettes in the urinal as they become soggy and hard
to light. - Mundungus
......
The future of wizarding is in your hands.
......
Hier begreift jeder sein Ende. (Here everyone grasps his end.) - Viktor
......
Why do Muggles have babies?
UNDERNEATH:
It's hereditary.
......
Directions to Hogwarts:
Go north until you smell shit.
That's Scotland.
Go west until you step in it.
That's Hogwarts.
......
Wizards with short wands will kindly stand up closer.
......
Wizards with fast wands will kindly lift the lid for a more direct hit.
......
If you are reading this you are probably pissing on your left foot.
UNDERNEATH:
Oh, no, sir. That be Dobby's right foot. Dobby's eyes grievously crossed.
......
Do not write on the walls. We don't shit in your notebooks. - The Faculty
UNDERNEATH:
What's found in our notebooks is shit anyway. - The Students
......
Who was Grindelwald?
UNDERNEATH:
Grindelwald was an aggie.
UNDERNEATH:
Grindelwald was a dirty nazi rat.
UNDERNEATH:
Grindelwald is secretly alive and awaiting the call of his people.
UNDERNEATH:
I am the rightful heir to Grindelwald, yet no one will listen to me.
UNDERNEATH:
You should have told us that sooner.
UNDERNEATH:
Someone was in this stall for three straight days.
......
'Tis better to have loved a Centaur
Than never to have loved at all.
......
Mudbloods to the showers.
......
Bring back the Knights of Walpurgis, the gang with a soul.
......
Roses are reddish
Violets are bluish
Thank goodness for Christmas
Or we'd all be Jewish
......
Is urination like divination?
UNDERNEATH:
Only in groups.
......
Keep your eyes open in Potions.
I'm putting the smaller turds in Snape's bowl of Bott's.
......
I'm in love with a Muggle and he's a virgin.
UNDERNEATH:
How did you ever find a rarity like that?
......
I want to be what I was when I wanted to be what I am now. - R.A.B.
......
I love men with thick pebble lensed glasses. - Sibyll
......
Young man, well hung, with beautiful body is willing to do anything.
P.S. If you see this Goyle don't bother, it's only me, Crabbe.
......
The barman is a great lay!
(Written by Aberforth in the ladies' room of the Hog's Head)
......
Peter Petti picked a peck of pickled peckers.
......
Voldemort sleeps with a night light.
......
I was a pseudo Squib for the MoM.
......
Trelawney takes it in the nose.
......
Please don't let me be pregnant. - Merope
......
Revive fertility rites. - Molly
......
To hell with home cooking. - Ron
......
If you shit here, eat here.
We don't just want the tail end of your business.
The Management, Hog's Head
......
I believe in capital punishment, but I don't think women should be hung
lilke men. - Lucius
......
Found at Beauxbatons:

La Femme c'est comme le cochon
Tous les morceaux sont bons,
Ça se dévote à toutes les sauces.

Woman is like a pig,
All the parts are good,
It goes well with all sauces.
......
Professor Dumbledore. Please call your office.

--
Chris
(Margaret Blaine has salmonellae!)

Re: Slytherin Toilet Graffiti [message #224313 ]

Mi, 01 März 2006 18:52

cwlNOSPAM

In article <cwlNOSPAM-0103061345500001 [at] o4d64.o.pppool.de>,
cwlNOSPAM [at] freenet.de (Green-Eyed Chris) wrote:

>In article <bffpds.57896956185359 [at] raxacoricofallapatoria>, Blon Fel Fotch
>Passameer-Day Slitheen <bffpds [at] raxacoricofallapatoria> wrote:
>
>>Green-Eyed Chris wrote:
>>
>>> John VanSickle wrote:
>>
<snip>

Goats are soft and pink inside. - Aberforth
......
Found in Godric's Hollow:

Here did I lay young Lily down;
I got the crabs and she got half a crown.
......
Legalise abortion! - Merope
......
Earn cash in your spare time.
Blackmail half-blood DE's.
......
Legalise Legillimency.
UNDERNEATH:
I knew you were going to write that.
......
Help get rid of the lunatic fringe.
UNDERNEATH:
Yeah! I keep telling her to cut her hair.
......
Pray for obscene owl post.
......
Ladies, start your day with a laugh.
Fly to work riding a feather.
......
The best laid plans of mice and men
Are filed away in the MoM.
......
Longbottom, you'll never be the man your mother was.
......
Hogwarts is being screwed by Apathy.
UNDERNEATH:
Who's Apathy?
UNDERNEATH:
I don't know and I don't care.
......
Prof. Vector counts on her fingers.
......
Calling Sanguini to the ladies' room.
Your Bloody Mary is ready.
UNDERNEATH:
He's been hanging about here for bloody ages.
......
Grindelwald is alive and drunk in Philadelphia.
......
McGonagall really shouldn't fly around without panties.
......
You can do things in an Anglia that you can't do in an MG.
UNDERNEATH:
Don't bore us with your Triumphs Weasley.
......
I am 10" long and 3" wide!
UNDERNEATH:
Interested. How big is your prick?
......
Be warned!! Hagrid reaches the parts other queers cannot reach.
......
Here I sit,
All broken-hearted.
Paid 2 Knuts,
And only farted.
......
Filch, you deserve a fifty pee rise.
......
Bring back the dinos. - Rubeus
......
Gringotts is the only bank you'll ever need.
UNDERNEATH:
Key under the mat!
......
Where will you be on the day of judgement?
UNDERNEATH:
Still here, waiting for a bus to Hogsmeade!
......
Life is just a bowl of toenails. - Borgin
......
Someone, somewhere wants some heavy breathing from you. - Sibyll
......
I'm not boasting, but I buy my socks in threes. - Dobby

...........

Since writing on lavatory walls is done neither for personal acclaim nor
financial reward, it must be the purest form of art.

--
Chris

Re: Slytherin Toilet Graffiti [message #230638 ]

Fr, 03 März 2006 20:32

GZICARD

For free pictures, contact Colin Creevey.
If you see Dennis Creevey approaching
Don't hang around
He'll start talking
About his rescue by the squid.

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