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Science Fiction » alt.startrek » Re: BIG STEVE'S ENTERPRISE REVIEW: "Home" **SPOILERS**
| Re: BIG STEVE'S ENTERPRISE REVIEW: "Home" **SPOILERS** [message #175550] |
Mi, 30 November 2005 15:49 |
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On Mon, 25 Oct 2004 20:16:29 GMT, "Steve Christianson"
<stevechristians*n [at] yahoo.com> wrote:
>X-No-Archive: yes
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>***SPOILERS for "Home"***
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>BIG STEVE HAS LANDED
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>(This review represents my personal opinions as a casual Trekker only)
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>Good points:
>
>(1) Very nice, sweet homecoming scene. Although I do admit I was waiting for
>Archer to utter a Bushism: "mission accomplished." <eg>
>
>(2) I'm still enjoying the jazzed up theme song, whiners can bite me.
>
>(3) Hey Big Steve was right, remember my Enterprise Veterans For Truth
>thread? Now here we go, an investigation by the #%$ [at] # Vulcans! Big Steve
>RULES, Big Steve KNOWS and has PWNED all of Trek! For the TRUTH about
>Enterprise, read nothing but BIG STEVE'S REVIEWS!
>
>(4) OK seriously, I do think Archer was right, the damn Vulcans did two
>things to help Enterprise during the Xindi War: Jack, and Shit. And Jack
>just left town.
>
>(5) T'Pol's mom's house sure was nice, Trip was right: it's beautiful. I
>liked that vase with the water running off it, very Japanese looking and I
>always thought of the Vulcans as sort of the alien version of the Japanese
>in a way.
>
>(6) The discussion between T'Pol and her mom was very nice, could be any
>discussion between a parent and child, and the bit about *returning* to the
>nest was a nice touch: I guess that with the long life spans Vulcans tend to
>stick with the homestead? Maybe the flip side of long life spans is low
>birth rates, so kids return home rather than go to new ones? I dunno, but
>it's an interesting speculation, maybe Vulcans just don't have
>ever-expanding suburbs like on Earth?
>
>(7) Despite my comments in #3 above, I'll give the Vulcan ambassador credit
>for being a man and taking his lumps. I know I have a reputation for being a
>hard-ass, but I can forgive a lot if people 'fess up to their wrongdoing.
>
>(8) T'Pol gives Trip a kiss on the cheek, awww waddnt dat thweet. But
>seriously folks, it was a very nice lead in to what was a classy ending:
>they kept it short and simple. Kinda makes me wonder if there will be a part
>two at some point in the future, even if not called "part two" by name.
>
>
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>Bad points:
>
>(1) The mountain climbing scenes and *cough* "touching" bonding scenes
>(touch this, babe) gave me bad Star Trek V flashbacks. Much as I wanted to
>curl up in a little ball, however, I have to save that kind of quality time
>for the election next week (eep).
>
>(2) Mr. Blowfish Face: enough said. That was...bad.
>
>
>
>Obscuranta/Nits/Rants/Drivel:
>
>(1) Don't you hate people who say that something is "off to the south" or
>whatever by referencing points of the compass? Like T'Pol's mom saying the
>guest room is "to the south" of the house. Can't people just say IT'S TO THE
>LEFT AND DOWN or whatever? Drives me nuts.
>
>(2) The first person who rings a gong while I'm on vacation and wakes me up
>at 4:00 AM is going to experience the Big Steve Vulcan Death Grip right then
>and there. And what's this bit about preparing breakfast, I've got two words
>for you: ROOM SERVICE.
>
>(3) Vulcan sure looks like a shit-pit: volcanoes, orange skies and fire
>plains? Must be hotter than hell. However, I do admit that the shots of the
>big Vulcan statues were cool.
>
>(4) Archer's bad dream: cool, dude. I get those kinds of dreams when I'm
>sick and use Nyquil as a mixer for gin.
>
>(5) HEY, "anything that happens on a mountain stays here" is a bad ripoff of
>LAS VEGAS ads.
>
>(6) Madam Chang's and the egg drop soup sounded kind of good, dammit now I'm
>hungry again.
>
>(7) Captain Jeffries...same guy as the Jeffries Tubes? I always thought that
>was some kind of feminine complaint, you know, like "sorry I'm so bitchy
>honey, I'm having a Jeffries Tubes kind of day."
>
>(8) Neil Armstrong used to say that the worst part of landing on the Moon
>was having to deal with the millions of morons who asked him aftertwards "so
>what was it like out there?" I'll bet Archer feels the same, I winced when
>his dimwit girlfriend asked "so what was it like in the Expanse?"
>
>
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>Babe Report:
>
>Some high quality older broad poontang in this ep. First we've got T'Pol's
>Vulcan mom, played by actress Joanna Cassidy, who looked pretty damn good in
>one of those boob-lifter body wraps towards the end. Then we've got Archer's
>old squeeze, who wanted to "climb his mountain and reach the peak by
>nightfall" *cough* and didn't look too bad either despite the bra cup
>padding.
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>Steve's Goddess points:
>
>Outfits weren't bad, the red velour is decent, liked the kiss she gave Trip
>on the way to the wedding. Too bad it wasn't some full-throttle French kiss
>so she could leave us with visuals of "T'Pol and Koss's Big Fat Vulcan
>Wedding" or something.
>
>
>
>Overall grade:
>
><finger snap> Liked it! A.
>
Steve's diet is still working !!!
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