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Science Fiction » alt.startrek » ST:TNG - Beavis and Butthead
| ST:TNG - Beavis and Butthead [message #248926] |
Fr, 21 April 2006 05:25 |
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Lookee what I found on my hard drive from way back: (I didn't write
this, but it's kinda funny)
============================================================ ===============
Packet: GRAVYARD
Date: 08-19-93 (00:59) Number: 1154
From: Mark Warnat Refer#: NONE
To: All Recvd: NO
Subj: Star Trek:TNG meats Beavi Conf: (74) F_trek
------------------------------------------------------------ ---------------
"Captains Log, stardate 1696.9, while orbiting the planet Khrap 2, Lt.
Commander Data and a search party found an ancient Earth space-pod from the
year 1993. The pod seems to have been launched from Earth, and was caught
in Khrap's orbit on it's way out into space. The pod itself appears to be
intact, however at this time, the contents are unknown. I have instructed
Data and ensign Woodbury to examine the contents of the aforementioned pod,
and get back to me with their findings..."
Woodbury: "Sir, there doesn't appear to be anyway inside of the pod."
Data: "Quite correct. This appears to be a holographic projection unit,
and this button should activate the holographic contents."
Data presses the large pale green button scarred with years of cosmic
turbulence and decay. A spark, and a quick wiff of ozone, and the image
spews forth in unbridled glory:
Butt-head: Huh-huh huh... that was cool.
Beavis: Yeah, cool.
Butt-head: Hey, check out the Eddie Munster dude! Huh-huh.
Data: Intriguing. This appears to be no ordinary distress signal or
message... it appears that these images have life of their own.
Ensign Woodbury, take a tricorder reading on these specimens and
report.
Butt-head: Huh, huh... you said specimen. That's cool.
Beavis: Yeah, and that guys name is Woodbury... if he was sad, he'd be
mourning Woodbury. Heh.
Butt-head: You said 'morning wood'... huh, huh.
Beavis: Huh, huh, huh.
Woodbury: They appear to be ancient anime from the 20th century, which have
somehow become intelligent lifeforms.
Butt-head: Hey can you overload that tri-cycle thing and blow it up? Fire
is cool.
Woodbury: Well, at least lifeforms.
Beavis: This sucks! C'mon, this sucks! Take us to your leader!
Data and Woodbury escort their companions to the bridge.
Picard: Welcome aboard the Enterprise gentlemen. I am sure you have many
questions, which Counselor Troi would be happy to entertain.
Butt-head: Huh, huh... I bet she'd like to entertain, huh, huh. Nice
hooters, babe.
Beavis: Yeah, those don't suck.
Butt-head: Ahem, huh, huh... we are here to like fight Klingon's around
Uranus. Huh, huh huh uh.
Beavis: Yeah, I think we should send a probe into Uranus.
Picard: I find your attitude most disturbing. Data, is this what 20th
century children were like back then? Delinquents who just loafed
in front of Television and thought obscene thoughts?
Butt-head: Huh, huh.. you said 'loaf'. That's cool.
Beavis: Hey, Butt-head, that doctor looks like the famous thespian Gates
McDonalds.
Butt-head: Huh, you said 'thespian'. Does that mean, like, you like to
go down on other chicks?
Beavis: That's cool. Yeah, her name *IS* 'crush her'.
Doctor Crusher leaves in a big huff, red-faced and embarrased.
Picard: That's enough, I won't have you insulting my senior offic----*
Butt-head: Huh, huh, hey Beavis... remember, I'm not only the hairclubs
president, I'm also a starship captain. Huh, huh.
Beavis: Yeah, heh, heh,... you look like Mr. Clean. That's cool.
Riker: Dammit, let's get them the hell off this bridge!
Butt-head: You said 'let's get them the hell off'... huh, huh.
Beavis: Yeah, spank my weasel.
Riker: Worf, escort our guests to the brig...
Worf: Gladly... grrr...
Beavis: You need, like some oxy-10 or something for your forehead.
Butt-head: You said 'forehead'. Huh, huh. Why do you like growl all the
time... I think you need some, like bran or something.
Beavis: Yeah, bran. You won't be so constipated.
Butt-head: Yeah, like you need to boldly go where none have gone before.
Huh, huh. huh huh uh.
Beavis: C'mon, this sucks. Does this suck Butt-head?
Butt-head: Yeah, Beavis, this sucks... let's go play some frog-baseball.
With a blink of an eye, and a brilliant flash of light, the images
disappear leaving the crew of the Enterprise alone again. They never
encountered those strange alien lifeforms again, as they were cancelled the
next season once the novelty of the cartoon ran out.
Huh, huh.. you said 'flash'. That's cool.
-mark
---
* Origin: BorgDOS v5.0 - Assimilate Another? [Y/n] (1:324/174)
--
Lance Corporal "Hammer" Schultz
Promote someone else.
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| Re: ST:TNG - Beavis and Butthead [message #248964 ] |
Sa, 22 April 2006 23:19 |
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You fairy :(
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